Look, books are expensive. I appreciate every one of you who buys my book in either print or eBook format, but I also get that it’s not cheap. And you’re probably a lot like me: a voracious reader. That habit adds up. So what do you do? Okay, there’s this place you can go and find new releases like, on the day they come out, and you won’t have to pay a freaking dime*.

THE LIBRARY.

WAIT. HEAR ME OUT.

Yeah, yeah, that seems obvious, but a lot of times your library doesn’t have genre fiction, especially if it’ a subgenre or from an Indie press like my publisher, @interludepress. So what now?

LIBRARIES LOVE TO BUY BOOKS. Here’s what happens when you ask your very excited librarian if they can get a copy of a particular book for the branch:

  • They go in the back room and hit the WE GOT ONE! buzzer, and all available librarians put on their party cardigans and do a choreographed dance number to I’M SO EXCITED
  • The winner of the dance off gets to approach the branch supervisor with proof that patrons want new books, DIVERSE BOOKS at that!
  • which, GEORGE (all crappy supervisors are named George. I don’t make the rules here, I just state them), is why you can’t reallocate the new book funds for a bigger parking space for yourself
  • they get all the relevant information (ISBN numbers basically) and put in an acquisition order and send that off
  • the books arrive at the library shortly after
  • the librarians breakdance in their pink satin jackets (yes, the men are wearing them too, because duh, they’re fabulous with appliqued glasses and hot pink lips on the back) and update the branch’s database with NEW BOOKS ARE HERE COME ON AND READ THEM
  • and now you and anyone else who comes into the library has a chance to read a new book

AND IT’S FREE FOR YOU, THE PATRON. The best scenario possible, really.

And who are you to deprive these book warriors their dance offs, huh? Why don’t you stop being selfish and think of the librarians? THEY WORK HARD.

library librarians books LGBT

FUN FACT: a lot of libraries have ONLINE REQUEST FORMS for people, if you might be a little adverse to going out in public and speaking directly to a person. I get it! It’s nerve wracking! So how cool is THAT? Trick question. Very.

(World Cat is the catalog for books in libraries, and you can see if YOUR library has the books you want.) Make a librarian’s day! (Janice won the last dance off, and your favorite librarian would just LOVE to make her eat it. The delicious treats she found on Pinterest, of course, and thoughtfully brought in to share with her fellow employees.)

*no dimes involved unless you don’t bring the book back on time.

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